Chapter 146

Serena's POV

My hand was already on the door handle when his voice stopped me. The quiet desperation in his tone made something in my chest ache, but I forced myself to stay focused.

"I won't let myself get caught between the Harringtons and the Thornes," I said, keeping my voice steady. "I don't have the power to handle either family. My peaceful life didn't come easily, Lucas. If I have to choose, I'll choose to stay away from you without hesitation."

The silence that followed was deafening. I watched as something flickered in his eyes - disbelief, maybe, or hurt.

"Is what we have really so fragile?" he finally asked, his voice barely above a whisper. The raw emotion in his words made me grip the door handle tighter.

"We barely have anything," I replied, forcing my tone to remain neutral. "If you remember, I only agreed to try dating. Clearly, it wasn't working out."

"I don't believe you." His words came out sharp, cutting through my carefully constructed facade. "I don't believe you feel nothing. Feelings are mutual - I can sense them."

Before I could react, his hand shot out, fingers wrapping around my wrist. The grip wasn't painful, but it was firm enough to make me acutely aware of how much strength he was holding back. His eyes, when they met mine, had a reddish tinge that spoke of exhaustion and something deeper, more volatile.

"I also don't believe you're the type to give in so easily," he continued, his voice growing more intense. "You wouldn't let either family's pressure make you give up without a fight. That's not who you are."

I could feel my pulse racing under his fingers, wondering if he could feel it too. "Lucas," I said softly, "I'm human, not invincible. Even I fear powerful enemies."

His grip tightened slightly, and I suppressed a wince. The pain was almost welcome - it gave me something to focus on besides the storm of emotions I could see building in his eyes.

"You've never backed down from a challenge before," he pressed. "You've faced down board members times your age, turned around failing companies, stood up to your entire family. Why is this different?"

I stayed silent, but something must have shown in my face because suddenly his expression changed. The intensity didn't fade, but it shifted, became more focused. More dangerous.

"What did grandfather say to you?"

The question hung in the air between us. I could feel the moment stretching, taut as a wire about to snap. His fingers were still around my wrist.

"He told me to leave you," I finally admitted. "On my own terms."

Lucas's grip went slack, but I didn't pull away. I watched as understanding dawned in his eyes, followed quickly by anger.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

I let out a small, bitter laugh. "What difference would it have made? Howard has the power to destroy everything I've built at StarRiver. Everything I've worked for. He made that very clear."

"I could have-"

"What?" I interrupted. "Protected me? You couldn't even protect yourself from being locked away and having your phone taken. How could you protect me from Howard's influence?"

The words came out harsher than I intended, but I couldn't take them back now. I watched as they hit home, saw the flash of pain cross his face before he could hide it.

I turned my gaze fixed on some point beyond the windshield, not wanting to see Lucas's reaction.

"You agreed to his terms?" His voice was carefully controlled, but I could hear the tension underneath.

"Yes." The word came out steady, almost casual.

"Did he threaten you?"

A small, bitter smile tugged at my lips. "Not exactly. He just... opened my eyes to reality." I finally turned to look at him, noting the barely contained anger in his expression. "Sometimes the truth is more effective than threats."

"Remember in the Bahamas?" I asked suddenly, the memory rising unbidden. "You promised to grant me one wish." A soft, humorless laugh escaped me. "I asked you not to lie to me. Pretty ironic, isn't it? This whole thing was built on lies."

I watched as Lucas's hands tightened, his knuckles turning white. Something in his expression shifted, a decision being made.

"The man you were with that night when you were eighteen..." he said slowly, each word seeming to cost him. "It was me."

My fist clenched involuntarily in my lap.

"I was staying on the same floor," he continued, his voice low and controlled. "I saw you with a man outside your room. He was trying to force you inside. I recognized you from Drew's high school photos, so I intervened. Asked him who he was. He couldn't give me a straight answer, so I got you out of there."

Fragments of memory began to surface - the corridor's spinning walls, a stranger's unwanted hands, then different hands, steadier ones. A hotel room that wasn't mine.

"I took you to my room," Lucas said, his eyes fixed straight ahead. "I was planning to leave, but you were feverish, face flushed. And then you..." He paused, seeming to choose his words carefully. "You kissed me. Pulled me onto the bed."

My nails were digging into my palm now, but I barely felt it. The memories were becoming clearer, filling in gaps I'd tried for years to understand.

"I know I should have resisted," he admitted. "But you were..." He stopped, shook his head. "That's no excuse. I should have done better."

"I asked if you hated him," he continued after a moment. "The man from that night. You said yes. I wanted to wait until you were more comfortable with me, until you didn't flinch at my touch anymore. I thought..."

"You thought what?" My voice came out surprisingly calm. "That if I fell for you first, finding out you'd taken advantage of me when I was drugged would hurt less?"

"No!" The vehemence in his voice made me flinch. "I never - it wasn't like that. I was trying to protect you that night."

"By lying to me for months?" The calm was slipping now, anger seeping through. "By watching me struggle with those memories, letting me think..." My voice cracked, and I hated myself for it.

"Serena..."

"Don't." I held up a hand, needing space, needing air. The car suddenly felt impossibly small. "Just... don't."

Memories were flooding back now - the taste of champagne, the room spinning, the feel of hands on my skin. His hands. Lucas's hands. All this time...

"So Howard was right," I said finally, my voice barely above a whisper. "About everything."

"What did he tell you?"

I smiled, though it felt more like a grimace. "That the Harringtons always get what they want. That you'd known me, wanted me, since that night. That this whole relationship was just you finally claiming what you'd marked as yours years ago."

"That's not-"

"Isn't it?" I cut him off. "You kept tabs on me through Drew. You manipulated your way into StarRiver's business dealings. You orchestrated every interaction until you had the perfect opportunity to approach me." Each word felt like glass in my throat, but I couldn't stop. "Was any of it real? Or was I just a conquest you'd been planning for seven years?"

The look on his face - pain, guilt, desperation.

"Serena, please," he reached for me, but I jerked away. "Let me explain."