Chapter 84

"Ethan, what did you do?" As I left Victor's expansive home, his words continued to replay in my mind. I felt a chill in the evening air, but it was nothing compared to the icy knot twisting in my gut. He made it clear that he wanted to deal with Richards and locate the mole. What about the deadline? Really tight.

As I slid into the automobile and gripped the steering wheel tightly, the night sky was a pitch-black nothingness. My mind was rushing, and I was breathing shallowly. For now, I had allayed his suspicions, but I could tell by the expression in his eyes that he wasn't convinced. Victor Alvarez was a person who was tough to trust, and once he lost that trust, he would act.

With a low growl resonating throughout the car, I turned on the engine and backed out onto the long, twisting driveway. I felt like the world was pushing down on me. Richards' unrelenting chase, Victor's threats, and the increasingly limited group of reliable people were all oppressive.

I needed clarification. Only one person remained who could possibly hold the answers.

The drive to Gerard's place went smoothly, but my mind was anything but. As I played back every conversation I'd had with him over the past few weeks, my knuckles whitened against the steering wheel. I didn't think Gerard took it lightly when he first considered working with me to defeat Victor, but I chose to withdraw after understanding how it would directly impact me. Why would he betray me now?

Gerard's favorite industrial area was gloomy and ominous. On either side of the narrow roadway, warehouses towered, their shadows stretching across the tarmac like talons. The sharp smell of rust and oil filled the air as I parked and got out. The eerie calm was accentuated by the faint buzz of faraway machinery.

Gerard's shadow caught my eye near the entrance of a darkened building. His stance was guarded, his tall, wiry figure tense. As I got closer, the stress between us was palpable.

"Gerard," I said curtly. "We must speak."

His eyes narrowed as they met mine, and he turned slowly. "Do we? I'm not sure I have much more to say."

I was shocked by the harshness in his voice, but I continued. "What on earth is happening? Did you share that evidence? Are you aware of the kind of fire you've caused?"

A sour frown twisted Gerard's lips. "Oh, I know quite well. To put it simply, do you?"

As his comments hit me like a slap, I moved in closer and lowered my voice to a menacing growl. "Gerard, you're playing a risky game. You've made us both targets, and Victor is already suspicious."

"You think I'm scared of Victor?" Gerard's laugh was piercing and empty of humor. "Ethan, it's not him who's hesitant. Yes, you are. And you become a risk because of that hesitation."

I tensed up. "A liability?"

"Yes!" he yelled. "You've forgotten the most fundamental survival rule-choose a side and stick with it-because you're too busy trying to play all sides. Your indecisiveness will result in our deaths."

His comments were too personal, but I wasn't going to let him know that. I retorted, "I've taken every precaution to safeguard this operation. Everything. And you've just made things much more difficult."

Gerard's face became stern. "I've finished tidying up your mess, Ethan. I no longer have faith in you. And I can't work with you if I can't trust you."

I was chilled by the certainty in his words. "I cautioned you that you were making a mistake," I said, but even I could hear the desperation seeping into my voice.

He shook his head. "No. The error was thinking you could seize the lead. Ethan, you've lost control. You are now on your own."

I stood in the cold, my head spinning, as he turned and left. Gerard was gone, and with him, one of the final pillars holding my life's collapsing structure had fallen.

The drive back to the city escaped my mind. I was thinking incoherently, with each thought getting darker than the one before it. When I finally arrived at my penthouse, I was tired, but I couldn't afford to take a break.

"Eliminate Richards," Victor demanded, echoing in my mind. It was a demand, not a request. Time was running out, and each second that went by made the rope around my neck tighter.

The amber liquid of the scotch I poured caught the dim glow of the urban skyline. The knot in my stomach was barely eased by the heat as it went down my throat. I had to think. I had to do something. However, each move felt like a step toward a precipice.

Ben was the only one left who could provide some explanation. My friend. In the midst of my life's turmoil, he had constantly been there with unshakable commitment. He was the one who could help me understand this.

Ben's home stood in sharp contrast to the stress I was feeling. Everything was so typical: the packed bookcases, the cozy atmosphere, and the subtle aroma of freshly made coffee. It was like entering another world, one free from the burden of treachery and impending danger.

"Ethan," Ben said in a bland tone. "Why have you come here?"

I watched him intently, noting the slight change in his manner. He was calm, almost aloof. He wasn't like that, and it made me nervous.

I sat down opposite him and said, "I needed to talk. Complicated things are."

His eyelid went up, but he didn't raise it further. "Are they not always?"

I let out a sharp breath and combed through my hair. "Victor no longer believes in me. Gerard is no longer there. Richards, too... Richards is pulling the noose tighter. I'm not sure how long I can continue like this."

Ben's face stayed unreadable. "Ethan, what do you want me to say?"

I was taken aback by his tone, which was casual and bordering on dismissive. "What is wrong with you?" I asked.

His eyes met mine with a serene focus as he leaned back. "Ethan, I'm exhausted. I'm sick of half-truths, lies, and secrets. For years, you've been balancing on this fine line, and I've always backed you. Now, though? I'm not so sure."

The atmosphere between us became thick. "What are you saying?"

He answered, "I'm saying I'm done playing guessing games. You must come clean if you want my help. Otherwise, don't waste your time."

I wasn't prepared for how hard his comments struck. Ben had always been the one person I could always count on, my rock. It felt like I was losing another piece of the framework that held my entire world together when I saw him pull away.

"Ben," I opened my mouth to speak, but the words stuck in my throat. It was impossible for me to tell him everything. Not quite yet.

His face softened a little as he stood. "Listen, Ethan. If you ever need me, I'll be here. However, I am unable to assist you unless you are willing to be honest."

As the effect of his words sank in, I slowly nodded. The realization hit me like a kick to the gut as I left his place.

The walls were closing in, and I was losing allies.